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Postcards from Abby Page 12
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It’s a blow more powerful than anything Tia has ever heard him say to her. Michael had been so good at avoidance and Tia too good at pretending that the truth now carries the force of an actual closed fist punch to her stomach. She sees the irony of it now. This exact conversation might have just saved her marriage two years ago. Now, it is too late.
“I’m sorry, Tia, but you wanted the truth.”
“I know. I asked for it.” She says softly.
“I think you knew all along.” And she knows Michael is right.
“I just wanted to hear it.”
“Is everything OK?” He sounds concerned.
“No, but it will be, it has to be.”
“If there’s one thing I know about you, Tia, is that if you say it’ll be fine, you’ll find a way to make it happen.”
“I think the word you are looking for is stubborn.” She says with a slight smile. She can hear the sound of a chuckle on the other end.
“I was trying to be nice.”
“We’re so past that.”
“You may be right.”
Tia’s head is spinning her around even though she is standing still and she knows that it is time to end the call, “Good night, Michael. I’m sorry for waking you.”
“Good night, Tia and take care of yourself.”
“I will.”
And just like that, Tia hears the dial tone and knows that she is one step closer to finding her way back. She is one step closer to finding herself again.
Chapter Eleven
Tia and Jack
“You’re scared?”
Jack is holding out his hand to me. He is on the edge of a cliff and I lean forward to look down. It must be a good ten feet before I see water.
“I am not scared. I just don’t feel like jumping.” I know I sound more confident than I feel.
“Come on. It’s fun. We’ll do it together.”
Inside, I am shaking, terrified but I don’t want Jack to see my fear. I want him to think I’m brave. “I’m not in the mood.”
“Please… do it for me?” He is still holding out his hand and his eyes are pleading. I am hesitant.
“I won’t let go. I promise.” His voice is strong and self-assured and I believe him. So I move my fingers to intertwine with his. He grasps my hand forcefully.
“On the count of three…”
“One”
“Two”
“Three!”
And just like that, my feet leave the ground and my stomach lurches forward. The wind is in my hair and my eyes are closed but Jack’s hand is still grasped in mine. Just as he promised, he does not let go. Then I feel the coolness of the water envelop me and it takes me a second to open my eyes and see him besides me, submerged, pointing to the surface, bubbles seeping out of the corner of his mouth. I move my arms and paddle to the surface. We emerge and I look up at the top of the cliff-where I was just a minute ago. I look over to Jack as I see him swimming towards me. Before I can process what just happened, his arms are around me and his lips are on mine. I can taste the salt on the tip of his tongue. Fear mingled with adrenaline still coursing through my veins and the touch of Jack’s skin on mine is electrifying. I realize then that I would jump a million times over to feel this way again. It is exhilarating. How I wish I could freeze that time in my life: when I was young, in love and was in control of my fears rather than the other way around.
Tia can feel the breeze combing through her hair and the warmth of the sun on her face. The sunroof on Jack’s car is up and the music is playing softly on the radio. Tia looks over and sees Jack with a look of concentration on his face as he tries to speed up to pass a slower moving car on the highway in front of him. His right hand is on the steering wheel and his left is on the stick shift in between them.
“So where are we going to first?” Tia asks.
Jack looks over to her quickly before his eyes go back to the road. “Some place you’ve never been before.”
She smiles and teases, “You do remember that I’ve spent my entire childhood here? There is not much I haven’t seen.”
He points a finger in her direction, waving it in front of her, “Not much but still not everything.”
“Now you have my curiosity up.” She playfully answers back.
“Sorry, Señorita Vale, you will just have to wait.” He will not budge. He’s being mysterious and Tia likes that.
“I know they say that patience is a virtue but I was never good at proverbs.”
“Well, lucky for you that I am patient for the both of us. Haven’t you ever heard of ‘good things come to those who wait’?” He chuckles softly and Tia looks over, not surprised to see the smirk on Jack’s face.
“No, can’t say that I ever heard of that one.”
“Are you sure you’re American?”
They both laugh and Tia is content to look out at the scenery for the rest of the ride. The trees, the hills, the flowers along the roadside. It was so nice to have a comfortable silence between them. She doesn’t feel the need to fill the silence with words. For too long with Michael, silence for her meant conflict and pain. Now with Jack, silence means peace.
When they finally stop at their destination, Jack parks his car across the street from a small marina. Muros is full of these small marinas. In fact, it is one of the town’s most famous landscapes: The sea, the backdrop of the green mountains and the docks lined with bright red, blue and yellow sail and fishing boats. Tia sees Jack walking to the trunk of his car and pulling out a picnic basket. Tia follows him out to the pier and they finally stop at a small bright red and white sailboat. On the side of the boat, the words “En Un Momento” is painted on in big swirly letters. Jack hops onto the deck first and then extends his hand out to Tia to help her on.
“Well you were right.” Tia admits. She feels something inside of her chest, a warmth that seems to be spreading.
“I was?” He seems genuinely surprised. “About what?”
“Good things do come to those who wait. This is unbelievable.” Now it is her turn to smirk.
From the smile on Jack’s face, it seems that he accomplished what he set out to do. “I hoped you would like it.”
“Is this yours?” Tia asks.
“Yes,” he admits. “I bought it a few years back. It’s my home away from home. My escape.” There is a look of pride in his face as he stares at the boat. Tia can imagine that he has often needed an escape, especially since Sarah died. She knows the feeling.
“I usually go to the movies for my escape. This is so much better.”
“Well, what better way to tour Muros than by sea?”
She laughs. “I can’t argue with that.”
“Just give me a few minutes and we’ll be on our way.”
Tia takes a seat by the steering wheel and watches as Jack maneuvers the anchor, sets the sails and checks a few gauges, finally steering the boat out towards the open waters. All the while, she can see Jack’s arms extended as he works and his muscles straining with force and the beads of sweat forming on the side of his neck. He is a picture of concentration and Tia, for the first time, since she landed, is feeling at ease and happy.
She looks over at Jack again and can’t help but feel the familiar flutter of her stomach. There is definitely an attraction there. Despite everything else that may have changed between them, that certainly hasn’t faded over time. Why is she fighting it, Tia wonders? No, for today, she wouldn’t think about it or fight against it. Just like the current underneath the sailboat, she would follow it to wherever it planned to lead her. No questions asked. Not today.
Before long, they are out in the middle of the river, watching the mainland go by at a steady but slow speed. The wind is gentle and the sun warm and Tia has her legs spread out before her on the deck, her face up to the sky, her eyes closed. She feels the rays of the sun on her cheeks and it is so calming that she hardly senses Jack’s presence next to her. When she finally opens her eyes, she sees that
he is sitting down besides her, looking at her, intently studying her features.
To break the intensity of the moment, Tia asks, “I’m no sailor but aren’t you supposed to be steering the boat?”
He shakes his head, “Yes, if we were moving but I lowered the sails and anchored here. I hope you don’t mind.”
“That depends. You’re not going to throw me overboard, are you?”
Tia looks over to him and can see Jack smirking. “No.”
“That’s good,” she says playfully but not entirely untrue. “Because I’m not such a good swimmer.”
“I seem to remember that. I also remember you weren’t too fond of heights either.”
Tia closes her right hand into a fist and lightly punches Jack on his shoulder. “That’s not nice to bring up a person’s fears.”
“You’ve always been so easy to tease, Tia.” Jack gets up and moves to a cooler by the front of the boat. He comes back with a bottle of white wine and two glasses. “Besides, who would I share a drink with if I did throw you over?” He opens the bottle and sits right back down next to Tia and pours them both a glass.
He is so close to her now that Tia can feel the side of his leg brush up against her bare skin. Out of habit, Tia tenses up for a brief moment but then reminds herself of the promise she made just a few minutes before. Enjoy, Tia. Don’t think so much, she tells herself. To steady her nerves, she takes a sip of the wine and immediately feels at ease, the liquid so cool and refreshing as she swallows it down.
“Mmmm, this hits the spot.”
“Its from our vineyard.” Jack says this with pride in his voice.
“Well that explains why I like it so much.” She raises her glass and clinks it with his glass as she takes another sip of the wine. They both look out towards the mainland and Tia breaks the silence first. “The name of the boat. Did you come up with it?”
“You like it?”
“In One Moment.”
“Yes, En Un Momento.” The words sounds so lyrical as he repeats it back to her in Spanish.
“That’s a great name.”
“Thank you.” Again, he says this in a prideful tone.
“Usually, men name boats after beautiful women or some corny catch phrase that sums up their manhood, like ‘Big and Strong’ or ‘Go For It’.”
Jack laughs at her remarks, “Yes, I’ve heard of some men doing that. That’s not my style though.”
“So how did you come up with it?”
“Simple, really,” he says. “It’s the way I choose to live my life.”
Tia is taken off guard by his answer. Even though she has been out with Jack now several times, his honesty is still something that surprises her and leaves her unprepared to respond to. “In one moment?” she asks in a whisper, not so much a question to him but a reflection for her.
“Si.”
She doesn’t know how to respond and stumbles for the right words in order to keep the conversation light. “Well, if I had a boat, I would probably name it ‘Map it Out’ or ‘Clear Direction.’ In case you haven’t noticed by now, I’m big on planning and looking ahead to the future.”
He waves Tia off with his hand as if shooing a fly. “I don’t like to plan.”
“Really? You sound just like Abby.” That must be why they get along so well, Tia thinks to herself.
“She’s a smart woman.”
“Well, that would drive me crazy, not knowing what to do next.”
He shrugs. “You’d be surprised. Life is more interesting when you least expect it. Besides, I did the planning thing once. It didn’t go so well.” When he says it, Tia cringes at the thought of Sarah and the plans Jack must have made with her once, so many years ago. He interrupts her thoughts. “Now, it’s the little moments that matter.”
Tia can’t argue with that. How can she? He lost his wife and no amount of planning stopped that from happening. Tia planned her whole life out and it never worked out the way she wanted. Maybe, this is a sign for her to live for the now, right here with Jack. Maybe it’s meant for her to go back in time and relive those little moments she had with him once.
Feeling the urge to let go, Tia raises her glass up in the air once more and shouts, “En Un Momento!” As she takes another sip of wine, Tia can feel the tingling of her fingers and knows that she will soon feel the buzz. She doesn’t care though. Something about those words strikes a cord deep inside her and she wants desperately, more than anything, to let go.
In that instant, Jack reaches out to push back a strand of stray hair flying in front of Tia’s face. He tucks it back behind her ear. His hand lingers over her right cheek and caresses it gently, moving the tips of his fingers to brush lightly against her lower lip. Tia does not move but rather lets Jack trace those same fingertips from her lip to her neck, leaving a trail of feathery touches that Tia feels all the way down to her toes. His fingers continue to trace little circles along her collarbone and Tia remains so still that she can hear the strong beating of her heart.
Jack’s face is within inches of her own now and she can feel his hot breath against her cool skin. She is paralyzed, but not with fear. It is desire that is coursing through her. She didn’t think it was possible to feel like that again after so many years. Tia was sure those urges died a long time ago with Michael. But being with Jack in the moment has awakened in her feelings that have laid dormant for so long.
Jack’s gaze is serious as his other hand moves to cup the back of her head, gently guiding her mouth toward his own. His movements are deliberate and confident, reminding her of that day at the edge of the cliff when he had asked her to jump with him. The pull of him then is the same as it is now. She knows that what she wants more than anything is to feel his lips again, the taste of him on her. And she’s ready for it and closes her eyes, waiting and expecting the sensations of his touch to wash over her.
What she doesn’t expect is the splash of the cool water on her feet as the boat suddenly sways from side to side, causing her to almost lose balance. She reaches her hand out to steady herself and Jack is quickly up on his feet, moving towards the sails. He is in full ‘sailor’ mode now and the moment is gone.
“These boats should really come with seatbelts or something.” Tia says in a ragged breath, trying to bring levity to the situation, while she recovers her self-control.
“There is a life vest under the seats in the back if you feel more comfortable wearing one.”
“No, I think I’ll be alright.” And she turns away so that he doesn’t see what she feels, which is the sudden rush of blood to her face.
“The winds are picking up. We should lift anchor and take advantage of the sails.” Tia is relieved to see that Jack does not notice the effect he has obviously had on her. Instead, he is concentrating on the task of sailing at hand.
“Good idea. Do you need any help?”
“No,” he says and smiles at her over his shoulder. “Just sit back and enjoy.”
And that is exactly what Tia does. They spend the rest of the afternoon sailing around Muros. Tia has recovered her composure and is back to enjoying the feel of the sun on her skin and wind on her face. She likes to watch him maneuver the sail, the muscles in his arms flexing. He knows what he is doing and she likes the fact that he is completely in charge. Two hours later, Jack docks the boat back to the marina where they had originally departed from and they decide to walk through the town, taking in the sights Tia had long since forgotten.
Tia is having so much fun seeing Muros through Jack’s eyes. He makes the simple daily events of life jump out at her, such as the smells of freshly made bread in the local bakery and the detailed stonework of the church in the center of town, seeped with thousands of years of history, or the children playing jump rope in a side alley as laundry hangs from ropes high above them, waiting to dry in the warmth of the sun. Walking next to Jack and having him retell stories of his family, local legend and his childhood, brings everything into focus like a long angled le
ns on a camera would, as vivid as the array of colors in a crayola box.
It is early evening when they head back to the Inn to change for the second part of their day spent together. Jack has promised to cap off the Muros tour with a local fiesta in another small town that isn’t too far away. Tia is excited at the prospect and she spends the better part of an hour agonizing over what she will wear, finally settling on a pastel yellow halter dress, which shows off her tan and accentuates her lean arms. She decides to wear her hair down, letting it air dry into soft curls that fall naturally over her shoulders. Looking in the mirror, she is happy with the results and hopes that Jack will notice too. When she opens the door to her room, he does not disappoint, standing there speechless, his eyes taking her in, looking her over from her face to her neck to her legs. It lasts for a brief few seconds but the whole exchange seems so intimate to Tia, even more so than any touch can possibly illicit.
“Bellisima.” He utters underneath his breath.
Tia smiles and still can’t believe that he finds her beautiful and not as a mother of two, not as a divorcee but as a woman. Tia takes a moment to appraise Jack, standing there as handsome as ever, dressed in a light pink polo shirt and washed out denim jeans with brown loafers. As she leans in to kiss him on both cheeks, she can smell the faint hint of his cologne and feel his clean skin on her lips. She closes her eyes, taking him in. When she finally opens them again, she looks down to see his hand extended. She smiles and places her hand in his. Their fingers interlock as he guides her down to the lobby and into the warm night.
They decide to walk the mile and a half to the fiesta, forgoing the car ride. The road is dark, except for the million of stars in the sky and the natural light of the full moon. In the distance, Tia can hear the familiar sounds of the band playing music and can see the lights strung up on the trees where the dancing is taking place. It will take less than a half hour to get there, but Tia is in no rush. She is enjoying every step, every glance up to the sky, the rustle of the trees and the sway of the branches as a breeze suddenly picks up and fades away just as quickly.