Pastures of Faith Read online

  Some days, Daniel caught glimpses of Rachel outside, mostly just when she was hanging the laundry to dry. While he was grateful that Lillian had extra help, between Samuel dragging his feet and Rachel not helping at all with barn and fieldwork, Daniel found himself increasingly annoyed. He was annoyed at his youngest brother for constantly teasing Rachel in such a heartless manner. But he was also willing to admit that he was annoyed with Rachel who refused to open up and explain what was bothering her. Being irritated was a feeling that Daniel didn’t like.

  He had grown up in a peaceful house, a house where everyone did what they had to do in order to contribute. No one complained about their duties, not even his sister Sylvia when she used to be forced to work at the market, dealing with Englischer tourists, something she had clearly abhorred. But, even though the situation upset him, Daniel kept quiet and went about his work. After all, he knew, complaining never solved anything.

  Whenever Daniel saw Rachel, he ignored her, pretending not to notice as she hung up the freshly laundered sheets or the children’s clothing. If he was in the barnyard, he’d hurry back into the dairy barn or into the horse shed, focused on the tasks at hand in the hopes that she hadn’t seen him. For the most part, he didn’t have to engage with her and, for that, he was thankful. Yet, even when he did see her, he couldn’t help but watch her from afar, admiring the fact that, despite everything, she did seem to work hard when helping Lillian. She just didn’t seem too keen on the outdoor work with animals and they hadn’t even broached the subject of having her help in the fields.

  Junior and Lillian weren’t quite sure what to make of the young woman’s strange behavior but dealt with it the best way that they could…by accepting it and creating alternatives that allowed Rachel to stay inside more. It was her comfort zone and, at this early stage of the relationship, they decided not to push her.

  “Besides,” Lillian confided in Junior, “She’s actually quite helpful with the house chores. And she sure does get on well with Linda.”

  “Whatever works,” her husband replied, a smile on his lips as he straightened the battered straw hat on his head before leaving the kitchen for the evening chores.

  From the kitchen window, Lillian watched her husband walk across the yard toward the barn. His broad shoulders and easy swagger always made her warm and happy inside. He was a wonderful gut man, she thought to herself as she watched him. Yet, she knew that the long days that started before sunrise and ended just after sunset were hard on him. Until the children were older, the work would continue to get harder.

  “I put the little ones to bed,” Rachel said softly as she entered the kitchen. “That Linda sure does like a story at bedtime.”

  Lillian glanced over her shoulder. “Ja, that she does,” she responded with a soft smile. Taking a deep breath, Lillian turned back to the dishes in the sink. They were clean but needed to be dried. “I suspect you’d prefer to finish the kitchen chores, ja? If so, I’ll go help Junior and Jonas in the barn.”

  The tone of her voice couldn’t hide the weariness. Rachel bit her lower lip and glanced at the window. She knew that Lillian was tired but there was work to be done. No one went to bed before the chores were finished. Staring at the ground, Rachel tried to summon her courage. She wanted to be a bigger help, especially to Lillian. After all, it was Lillian who made her feel most comfortable at the Lapp farm.

  With a deep breath, she said, “I reckon I could go help, ja?”

  Lillian watched the young woman before her. If only Rachel would talk to her, tell her about whatever turmoil she was experiencing, perhaps there was a way to help her. She knew that Rachel often cried in the solitude of her room. It was obvious that something had happened to her but there was no discussion, no questions. If Rachel chose to share her story, she would. But, for now, the offer to help the men was a good first step.

  “That would be right gut, Rachel. Danke,” Lillian said.

  The night air was cool and the cicadas were beginning their evening song. The sky glowed amber, a unique orange that bled into various shades of purple and black. Rachel stood in the doorway of the barn and listened. The cows were in the field, having been turned out for the night. The horses were also let out to pasture. From inside the barn, she could hear the scraping of metal against the concrete floor as the men tidied the barn in preparation for the morning milking.

  She spotted Junior in the back and walked over toward him. “I can help,” she said softly, her eyes downcast as she spoke.

  He looked up, startled by her presence. “Ach, Rachel,” he said. He glanced around the barn. “I didn’t see you there.”

  “I can help,” she repeated.

  “That you can,” Junior said. “Brother Daniel is getting hay for the morning feeding. Perhaps you could help him, ja? Would be right appreciated, for sure and certain.” He gestured toward the back of the barn before he returned to work, scraping last bits of manure into a wheelbarrow to be carted out to the spreader behind the barn.

  The kerosene lantern hanging from the barn rafters cast soft glows in the nooks and crannies of the barn. Rachel made her way to the back of the barn and up the three stairs to the hay room. The hay was stacked in round bales, several side by side, creating a maze to wander through. Rachel stood in the center for a moment, breathing in the musty smell of the hay. She could tell that it was old, having probably been cut and stacked during the last fall cutting. But soon, the first spring hay would change the odor to one that was fresh and clean.

  He came around the corner, pushing the square cart filled to the top with hay. He didn’t see her standing there and, before he could stop the cart, he ran into her. The force of the collision caused her to fall backwards, her back hitting a bale of hay before she crumbled to the ground.

  “Oh!” she cried out, rolling onto her back and clutching at her leg.

  “Rachel!” he exclaimed in surprise. He dropped the handles to the cart and hurried over to try to help her. Kneeling by her side, he touched her arm. “Are you OK?”

  Yanking her arm free, she tried to sit up without his help. “Of course not!”

  “I didn’t see you,” he offered meekly.

  “That’s obvious,” she snapped back, fighting the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes to her cheeks. “Who hays at night for the morning feeding anyway?”

  Daniel leaned back on his heels and frowned. “Why are you out here?”

  She rubbed at her leg and glared at him. “I was trying to be helpful.”

  “Well, I’m sorry that I hit you with the cart, Rachel. I wasn’t expecting to see you standing there, that’s for sure and certain.” He stood up, reaching down for her hand. “Let me help you back to the house. Better put some ice on that leg, ja?”

  But she refused his help. Struggling on her own, she tried to stand up by leaning against the hay bale. “I’m fine,” she stated, more to convince herself than Daniel. Defiantly, she stood before him and put her hands on her hips. “I said I would help out here. Junior sent me to work with you.”

  Raising his eyebrows, Daniel stared at her. It surprised him that she had offered to help. But it surprised him even more that she hadn’t taken advantage of the accident with the cart, no matter how minor, to high-tail back to the house. The determined look in her eyes showed a hidden strength that he hadn’t noticed before now.

  “Well, reckon you could top off the water troughs for the cows and buckets for the horses. The hose is back in that room over there,” he said, pointing back to where she had originally entered the barn.

  Thirty minutes later, the chores were finished. Rachel limped back to the house, refusing any help from Daniel or Junior. The two men followed, silent as they watched her. She walked with her head held high, despite the fact that both her ego and leg were bruised. Yet, this time, she had stood her ground and contributed to the family chores instead of allowing anyone to banish her back to the house. There was something prideful in the way she walked, as though she had
conquered something larger than they understood.

  “My word!” Lillian exclaimed when the trio walked into the kitchen. Rachel still had dirt and hay on her dress and her leg was clearly scrapped. “What happened, Rachel?”

  “Daniel knocked me down,” Rachel said.

  “What?” Lillian gasped, her gaze shifting from Rachel to Daniel.

  Taking a deep breath, Daniel rolled his eyes. “With the hay cart. By accident.”

  Lillian helped Rachel to the sofa, propping her foot upon one of the kitchen chairs. “You don’t seem to have good luck in that barn, do you now?” she said lightly, trying to soften the mood in the room.

  “He should look where he is going,” Rachel retorted.

  “As if I expected to see you standing there,” Daniel shot back before he could stop himself.

  Junior reached out and touched his brother’s arm to silence him, a gentle reminder that sharp words didn’t solve problems. Daniel exhaled heavily, wishing someone would remind Rachel of that fact. However, recognizing the wisdom of his brother’s unspoken words, Daniel took the higher road and made his way to the icebox to gather some ice for a cloth.

  He walked over to Rachel and placed the makeshift bag of ice on her ankle. “I did say I was sorry,” he offered. “It was an accident.”

  “Accidents happen,” Lillian said, placing her hand gently on Rachel’s shoulder. “Less said, soonest mended. Tends to keep the peace and avoid unnecessary hurt, ja?”

  The frown on Rachel’s face slowly began to soften. For a moment, she didn’t say anything. Everyone stared at her, waiting for her reaction. But, to their surprise, she didn’t have one. Instead, she lifted the ice from her leg to examine the beginning of a purple bruise that was forming. “At least it’s not broke or sprained,” she said softly. She looked up at Daniel and tried to smile but, as soon as their eyes met, she looked away. “Just a bruise, t’is all.”

  Daniel stood quietly next to her, uncertain what to say or do. He wanted to retreat to his side of the house, escape any additional lashings from that sharp tongue of this distant cousin of his. But he felt obligated to stand by, insuring that she was, indeed, all right. “Mayhaps an aspirin might help with the pain,” he offered.

  “She’ll be fine,” Lillian announced, standing back up. She glanced over at Junior and noticed him watching the scene with an amused expression. “I think it’s best for all of us to say good-night. Another long day tomorrow for everyone.”

  Hesitantly, Rachel handed the ice bag to Daniel. “Danke, Daniel,” she managed to say, her eyes meeting his for just a brief moment before she quickly looked away. “Should be just fine by the morning, I suppose.” She stood up, steadying herself on the arm of the sofa. He reached out to touch her arm, half-expecting her to yank it from his grasp but, instead, she let him help her toward the stairs.

  The three Lapps watched as she ascended the stairs. A quiet befell the kitchen and Daniel was the first to break the silence. “Who would have thought that she’d come out to help? It truly was an accident.”

  Junior kept his hands in his pockets while he leaned against the counter. “Understood, brother.”

  “She has a sharp tongue,” Daniel complained.

  “That’s for certain,” Junior agreed.

  Daniel stared at him, wondering why his brother was hiding a smile and responding with a hint of a tease on his words. “I don’t understand her at all,” he stated.

  Lillian took a deep breath. “You have to realize that she’s adapting to being away from home. I bet that, once she finds a comfortable place in our lives, she will allow us to be a stronger part of hers. In the meantime, patience and kindness are what the good Lord would want from us. Remember that she has been through a terrible loss at a young age. We need to be more understanding, perhaps see things from a different perspective.”

  Daniel listened to her words. He couldn’t imagine a young woman with no sisters, losing her mother, and being sent to another state to live with family that she had never met. Perhaps, he thought, there is some merit to Lillian’s wisdom. “She could still be nicer, though,” he mumbled. “But, I suppose I can try to count to ten…or twenty.”

  A laugh escaped Junior’s mouth and he clamped his hand down on Daniel’s shoulders. “I’m sure you will, brother. I’m sure you will.”

  Daniel frowned at his brother and gave a shake of his head. He wasn’t exactly certain what Junior meant but Daniel wasn’t about to investigate further. Besides, he thought as he glanced at the clock, it was almost eight and he was tired, ready for a good night sleep before getting up in the morning for the four o’clock milking and a long day in the fields.

  “Best be leaving,” Daniel mumbled. “Enough excitement around here for one night.” He retreated out of the kitchen and into the darkness as he walked away from the grossdaadihaus toward the main house, his head still trying to make sense of this young woman who seemed to create a storm wherever she went.

  Chapter Five

  Daniel looked up as his oldest brother walked into his mother’s kitchen, entering from the door that connected his parents’ house with the grossdaadihaus, the separate house where he lived with Lillian and the children. It wasn’t often that Junior came over, especially in the middle of the day since he worked at the carpentry shop. They were always busy building their sheds, especially in the springtime.

  Junior greeted his mother with a warm smile. While he wasn’t her firstborn child, there had always been a special bond between Katie and Junior. The rest of the children recognized that without question. Junior was her first son, the one that silently vowed to take care of his parents and the one that was the next patriarch of the family. But the bond between mother and son went deeper. They had a friendship about them, one that the other children admired with respect. If jealousy was in their nature, the green head of envy might have bitten them but, thankfully, it didn’t.

  So it surprised Katie when Junior headed straight toward his younger brother, a purpose in his stride. Both David and Samuel sat at the table, noticing that Junior barely nodded to them. Clearly, their oldest brother was on a mission.

  Nonchalantly, Katie watched her sons out of the corner of her eye as she continued washing the dishes from the noon meal. With Junior speaking in her presence, she knew that it was not too private a conversation. But she wondered what was so powerful strong on his mind.

  “I have a favor to ask of you,” Junior said, avoiding his brother’s eyes. With his hands tucked into his front pockets and his feet shuffling on his mother’s linoleum floor, it was clear that he was more than uncomfortable approaching his brother.

  “What is it, brother?”

  Taking a deep breath, Junior plunged forward. “It’s Rachel.”

  Daniel pursed his lips and leaned back in the chair. Of course it was Rachel, he thought. It was always about Rachel. Over the past few weeks, he had tried to avoid her as much as possible, especially since that last incident in the hayloft. The few times that he had seen her, she had seemed a bit more reserved and calm but Daniel didn’t want to tempt fate by engaging with her.

  Unfortunately, that hadn’t stopped Samuel from instigating Rachel whenever he saw her. He’d ask her if she wanted help with hanging the laundry or weeding the garden. Once he even teased her about crying that day in the barnyard. His mocking tone did not go unnoticed and, on more than one occasion, she would storm away, retreating to Lillian’s house. Samuel would laugh out loud, cackling like a young schoolboy at her reaction. Daniel was glad that Junior finally informed their father about Samuel’s behavior. However, despite Daed reprimanding him while Mamm frowned at her youngest son, Samuel didn’t seem to care.

  Daniel was increasingly frustrated with his younger brother, not understanding why he took such delight in teasing Rachel. But, that wasn’t his problem. He had tried to befriend her, tried to get her to open up to him. But all of that had backfired. So, Daniel merely avoided the situation by steering a wide berth around
her. Yet, he was growing increasingly annoyed with how the nightly conversations seemed to focus on Samuel’s misbehavior with Rachel.

  But what did that have to do with him? Daniel certainly wasn’t mixed up in the bickering. “What about Rachel?”

  Junior pulled one of the kitchen chairs out and sat down. Nervously, he drummed his fingers on the tabletop, anxious as he proceeded. “Ach vell…she’s lonely and sad. Lillian hears her crying in her room during the day.”

  Samuel laughed. “That girl is always crying!”

  Katie frowned at him. “Samuel, please!”

  Junior ignored his younger brother. “She needs to get out of the house, start meeting people.”